Sunday, October 4, 2015

Everything Happens For A Reason

Sometimes disappointing things in life just happen. We don't know why they do or we may think the universe is just against us, but I have always held on to the faith that sometimes, everything happens for a reason. We might not always know the reason at the time, and we might not ever find out that reason. 

The week my cousin passed away, I had picked up around 72 hours at work because I had/have been having some financial difficulties lately. Between finishing out the week I was on and the new week that was coming up, I would have put in 96 hours total between both my clients.  It wasn't something I wanted to do, but I needed to do. I had prayed for help about a week or two prior, and all of a sudden, my clients other aide just up and left her, telling the agency she wouldn't be able to work for the next few weeks. I felt that was my sign, my help that I asked for. So I called my agency picking up whatever hours I could. 

So I finished up the Saturday of that week with a 12 hr shift. That was August 1st. I worked Sunday, August 2nd, a 12 hour shift.  Long story short, with the client I picked up the extra 72 hours with, when I got in on Tuesday for my evening shift, I found out her son had cancelled for the next week and a half starting with Wednesday, August 5th. I was upset and angry. But then, my mom reminded me "Everything happens for a reason."  On August 6th, when I would have been working a 12 hr shift, at 9 am in the morning, that's when I got the text from one of my aunts to call her. That's when I found out my cousin died.

 I was extremely grateful to be home with my two children and not at work. I was able to break the news to them and we were able to find comfort in one another. I was able to be there for my Aunt in her time of need. I was able to partake in helping create memory boards for my cousins services. Something I wouldn't have been able to do if I had been working 12 hour shifts. In a time of darkness, I was grateful to be able to have some positives that came out of it. 

As I have stated before, life is about trying to find the positive moments that you can, find what you're grateful for and blessed with. This weekend, my mom, my daughter and I were scheduled to go away together for an all girls weekend at my parents cabin which is located in the southern tier part of WNY near Olean, NY. 

We were looking so forward to it. It's especially pretty this time of year with the fall leaves changing. Well as the week went on, we knew it wouldn't be as beautiful as we had hoped due to weather. It's been raining, a little cooler and damp! 

But as I packed up my pumpkin cake I had just finished frosting, and waited for my daughter and her boyfriend to get home from school, I got a call from my mom. She sounded so disappointed. 

We have a very steep, stone hill that leads up to our cabin. To this day, so many years later, we often wonder why on earth we purchased a cabin on such a steep hill. Anyway, my parents had paid a guy to grate the hill and straighten it out as every few years, it gets pretty weathered and rutted. Well, it wasn't done as quickly as they had hoped. They actually expected it done much sooner than just this past week. 

So when my mom called me, the last thing I expected her to tell me was that we couldn't go to our cabin. As I said, the guy just fixed the road and turned the dirt and had grated it. He told my parents that with all the rain we had been getting, it might not be a good idea to go up the road because it is so wet. I am not sure if he was worried about our tires causing damage to the freshly grated road because of the potential for mud, or if was worried about the potential for danger trying to make it up in the mud. I still wanted to try and go. My mom has an AWD vehicle. I said "We can make it, let's go!!" I've always liked to believe we are unstoppable! Now that I'm writing this, and thinking about my cousin, knowing her, she definitely would have risked it and gone anyway. I don't believe she let anything stop her. 

However, my mom in her infinite wisdom brought up a very good point. In all the years we have had our cabin, driving there and never knowing what we would face once we got to that hill, no one has ever called us to tell us you might not want to come. But the fact that this guy called us and told us, my mom felt we should heed the warning. So as disappointed as we were, we decided it best to stay home. Now to break the news to my daughter.

She actually took it better than I thought. I mean, yes, she is 19 and a very mature 19. It's not like I was expecting her to stomp her feet and pitch a fit! LOL But, she was the one that reminded ME about finding the positivity!! 

I have only adopted this new mentality in my life recently. I am still learning to embrace it and accept it in a few different facets of my life. It's about a whole new journey for me. It's about teaching myself and learning to control the things that only I can control. It's more about me not dwelling in negative energy and focusing on the positivity. I was very proud of my daughter that in that moment, she reminded me of that with her attitude. That no matter what, it's all going to be ok. I feel blessed and accomplished that I feel as if my new outlook has been affecting her positively also!!

With the disappointment behind us, we made a new plan. My mom came over to my house with the plan to spend the night. She brought everything with her for what we would have had for breakfast the next day. We all got comfy, we ordered in Chinese food for dinner, played a game and made popcorn, and stayed up til 1 am having some quality family time. Oh and of course, no family fun time evening is complete with out good music!!

Yesterday, we had coffee and pumpkin cake, and later we made a delicious breakfast of bacon, eggs, biscuits and juice. Mom stayed for most of the day and we enjoyed each other's company just as much as we would have at the cabin and I think that's what matters most. 

So as I sit here on my porch, sipping coffee on a beautiful, crisp fall Sunday morning, I am reminded life happens and life goes on. But if you dwell in the negative parts of life, you lose out on some of the wonderful blessings life has to offer. You lose focus on what is right in front of you. The next time something disappointing happens, take a step back and re-center yourself. Take a breath and take a moment to be grateful for what you have in that immediate moment. Your health, a loving family, and a roof over your head. Say thank you. Remember to cherish those moments and to always embrace the positivity. 

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